


Hold the Phone

by itdamyeons



Category: NU'EST
Genre: ...i guess, Canon Compliant, Getting Together, M/M, Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, Pining, nsfw ft. emotions, pretty much everyone other than jren are minor appearances and dongho's just a mention, this is... basically pwp i'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 16:14:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12193305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itdamyeons/pseuds/itdamyeons
Summary: Jonghyun thinks he's content with his Shameful Shower Wanks™ and admiring Minki from afar, but Minki's determined to convince him otherwise.





	Hold the Phone

**Author's Note:**

> There's no fixed setting for when this takes place, so that's up to you! The only thing to be kept in mind time-wise is that it takes place sometime during the several times they've shared a room, I suppose!
> 
> A disclaimer;; I'm,,, I'm not much of a nsfw author,, but it's for jren after all, so I tried my best.
> 
> Let me know if you find any typos!!

 

 

The first time Jonghyun had stumbled across proper porn, it was in the company of a couple of his elementary school friends-- one of whom had managed to procure a rather raunchy magazine from their elder brother. It was really gross at first-- an opinion Jonghyun shared with most other children his age, but it grew on him over time (also like with most other children his age) and by his late teens he had a rough idea about what his preferences were.

Currently, he doesn’t keep too much of it around-- just a bunch of videos on his phone. A lot of it is, well, animated-- something Aron hasn’t let him forget and quite possibly never will. Not since the day he showed up at Jonghyun and Minki’s room, holding Jonghyun’s iphone  between his fingers (which he had presumably found wherever Jonghyun had been unfortunate enough to leave it before setting a passcode), with a taunt of _nice stash you’ve got in here_.

Minki, who was also in the room, had openly and immediately voiced his curiosity with an _oh?_ alongside Jonghyun’s panic-stricken yelp. Aron had made motions to throw the phone to him, but ended up hesitating and then making a mad dash in the other direction instead.

Letting other people know about what he watches in the secrecy of the night had not exactly been in Jonghyun's agenda, so he had immediately leapt off of his bed in hot pursuit.

Ten minutes of chasing and a perfect execution of a Full Nelson later, Jonghyun had managed to successfully retrieve his phone.

 

\------

 

A couple of weeks pass and Aron doesn’t bring up what Jonghyun’s been dreading to hear. He’s certain Minki probably tried to pull out details at some point or the other but regardless of how much Aron spoils Minki, Jonghyun knows he wouldn’t tell him anything before gauging out Jonghyun’s own reactions regarding the matter first.

Jonghyun is mostly relieved about that at the very least, but there’s a tiny feeling that pulls at his gut nonetheless. He’s guessing Aron might have actually looked through some of the videos, from how often he makes jabs at the fact that some of the porn was hentai.

That’s not the bit that Jonghyun is worried about though. 

If Aron has seen the hentai, he’s quite possibly noticed a little something about it--

The fact that it’s gay porn.

 

Jonghyun has literally _no_ porn featuring girls on his phone, and he’s never regretted it till now.

Aron hasn’t even done so much as mention it, and it’s eating Jonghyun up from the inside. Aron isn’t an idiot by any means, and Jonghyun’s certain that he’s put two and two together. That being said, the inevitable _so, are you into guys, by any chance_ , never shows its face and it’s _terrifying_. Jonghyun debates on whether to bring it up himself or to leave the matter as is.

Deleting the porn from his phone wouldn’t be a bad idea either; even though he’s positive he’ll never let anyone break into it again.

It's fine, he reckons, for the time being.

 

He stares at the lock screen of his phone and sighs. The afternoon sun filters through the curtains of the room, and the vigorous conversation taking place between two magpies perched somewhere outside the window does little to alleviate Jonghyun’s boredom.

There’s nobody around, and if the porn is still there he might as well use it, he thinks, and makes his way to the bathroom.

He selects a video at random, and plugs in his earphones.

Jonghyun generally doesn’t go at it regularly. It’s more of a pastime for when he’s alone in the dorm. He isn’t particularly loud, so he doesn’t worry too much about getting _heard_ per se, but there’s something about masturbating while someone else is in the room outside that ticks him off personally.

He usually waits till Minki is either busy in someone else’s room, or not in the dorm at all.

 

 _...Minki_.

 

Just like that, and just like always, Jonghyun’s thoughts inevitably shift to Minki.

He tries not to let it happen, but he can’t stop himself. It’s almost an addiction.

 

The whole situation with Aron exposing the contents of his phone is a tad ironic to be honest, mostly because he’s never _actually_ needed the porn. It’s there just so that Jonghyun can walk into the bathroom with it, so that he can tell himself that that’s what he’s going to use to get himself off. 

It’s never what ends up happening. He knows that it’s just an excuse, so that he can walk into the bathroom feeling a little less guilty— as if he’d never intended to think about anything else.

He knows that he’s only kidding himself; he knows it as intimately as he knows the fact that he can’t remember the last time he got off without thinking about Minki.

 

Minki, who was good-looking when Jonghyun first met him, to say the least; who has only become more dazzling by the day. 

Jonghyun inhales shakily.

 

He doesn’t even know if he has a favourite part of Minki’s body. Thinking about just one thing isn't easy.

He thinks about Minki’s waist, and how it would feel grinding against his own at a tantalising speed. He imagines Minki would be nothing less than enthusiastic to speed up, but would want to watch Jonghyun writhe with want first.

He thinks about Minki’s voice, about him trying his best to hold himself back as they gradually pick up their pace. About how he’d attempt (horrendously) for a second at talking dirty, but end up laughing at how silly he sounds.

He thinks about Minki’s eyes, dark with arousal, and he imagines them never looking away as Minki tilts his head back a notch, drops open his mouth, and comes with a moan.

 

This imaginary Minki is quieter when he tries to talk next.

 _You know_ , he whispers, words meant only for Jonghyun’s ears,

_You know how much I love you, right? Jonghyun?_

He licks across Jonghyun’s lips before kissing him, and the Jonghyun sitting alone in his bathroom whimpers with thoughts he just barely dares to entertain.

 

He’s way past being able to continue a single train of thought. Scenes momentarily flash in his mind, some grounded in reality and some just stemming entirely from his imagination. 

He knows he won’t need much longer.

 

Minki, lounging on his bed after taking a shower with only a towel wrapped loosely around his waist, his hair still damp, checking something on his phone.

Minki, in between practice, drinking from his water flask with a stray droplet sliding down his lips, his chin, his neck.

Minki, his expression feigning innocence as he licks a stripe up a popsicle when he knows Jonghyun is looking.

Minki,

with his self-proclaimed heart-shaped lips sinking down on Jonghyun’s cock as if they were made to do nothing else in the world.

Jonghyun is quiet when he comes onto his right hand, and he wipes it off with toilet paper after regaining his composure. He flushes down the toilet paper, and wishes that it takes even a fraction of his guilt with it.

 

\-----

 

Aron ends up never asking about the porn. But after finding out who _does,_  Jonghyun thinks that he’d have taken the alternative any day. 

Minki brings it up out of nowhere on a day they’re relaxing in their room, and Jonghyun does a double take. Minki wants to know about what he watches, so Aron hasn’t already told him. That being said, Jonghyun's also certain Minki has always been aware of the fact that he has less than decent things carefully hidden on at least his laptop, so this sudden increase in interest makes no sense.

He refuses, of course.

 

\-------

  

To put it mildly, the next few days are a huge pain in Jonghyun’s neck.

 

“Show me,” says Minki.

“No.”

“ _Show_ _me_.”

“ _No_.”

“I’ll buy you food?”

“That won’t work on me, try someone else.”

 

\-----

 

“I’ve got it.”

“Huh?”

“Anime cosplayer porn.”

“Minki, _no!_ ”

“I won’t believe you until you show me. You can’t leave me hanging like this!”

“I can, and I will.”

 

\------

 

“How bad can it be? I’ve seen some pretty scarring things over the course of my life, you know? More out of a sense of curiosity than its, uh, intended purpose though. Just for the record. Kung-Fu sex. Space cadets with miniature lightsaber dildos. Horses in stilettos.” 

“... Okay, ignoring the fact that you have... issues, my porn is nothing _that_ adventurous.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“...”

 

\-----

 

He holds out for maybe another week. 

One evening, Minhyun drops into his room and tells them that he’s going with Dongho and Aron to catch a movie they’d been looking forward to. It’s a movie that Jonghyun had wanted to watch himself-- an animated flick, one that had something to do with cats? The tickets have already been bought though, and Minhyun tells him it’s a full house, so Jonghyun settles with having to go later.

At around 8pm, the main door creaks, signalling Minki’s return from the store he’d been at practically the entire day. He places his bags aside and quickly changes into only his boxers—a routine for the members when they’ve got nothing to do but laze around in the dorm. Jonghyun isn’t wearing much aside from a pair of boxers either, having stayed inside the whole day, but living with four guys puts one past the point of finding it to be out of the ordinary.

Minki promptly places himself down on Jonghyun’s bed to take his daily crack at convincing Jonghyun to reveal his porn.

Jonghyun had already felt himself wearing down over the last few days, and he decides he might as well show Minki if it’ll get him to shut up about it. To be honest, he’d been going back and forth the entire afternoon about whether he should just go ahead and do it, but he hadn’t expected making a decision so soon. The exhaustion from a day of shopping usually causes Minki to make a beeline straight for his bed.

And besides, if Minki really was expecting something along the lines of his earlier suggestions, he’d probably just find normal gay porn boring.

Jonghyun caves.

“Fine,” he says, and the way Minki’s smile turns mischievous sets his heart racing just a little.

“None of the boring stuff though. Show me exactly what you didn’t want anyone to see.”

Jonghyun shifts uncomfortably. “You promise you won’t judge though, right?”

“No more than I judge you normally!”

Jonghyun frowns at him, but takes his phone out as Minki rests himself on his side, against the headboard of the bed. He picks out a random video, one that he remembers the contents of, having at least watched it previously.

 

Upon clicking the play button a man’s moan ripples throughout the room, and Jonghyun speedily reduces the volume by a few bars. 

He feels his face heating up despite himself, watching Minki’s eyes glued to the screen.

“This is ...guy on guy action,” Minki says, eyes flicking back and forth between Jonghyun’s face and the screen of the phone, and second thoughts pull at Jonghyun’s mind.

Minki notices, and tries to get him to relax by nudging their shoulders together.

“Are you kidding me? That’s it? This is really what you were getting so worked up for,” he teases, but he sounds genuine enough. He’s smiling. 

“I watch gay porn too,” he reveals, and Jonghyun turns to face him so fast he almost pulls a nerve.

It’s… probably for the better to not to ask him about that.

 

The sounds from the video grab his attention again. The video plays out, and the two male actors take no time in getting down to business.

Minki lets out reactionary hums every now and then, and Jonghyun doesn’t know if it’s in approval or disapproval. The temperature of the room feels like it’s suddenly skyrocketing though, and Minki starts looking around the room skittishly. Knowing that he's getting jittery doesn’t help Jonghyun’s situation much either.

Jonghyun tries to pretend he doesn’t notice the strain slowly growing in his boxers: something that gets even worse upon making the mistake of peering over to see if Minki’s in a similar situation. Needless to say, the outline of Minki’s dick is visible through the cloth of his underwear, and Jonghyun feels his breath catch in his throat.

Trying to ignore Minki slowly getting turned on is a lot more difficult than Jonghyun had bargained for.

 

When the video ends, Minki breaks the silence, and he sounds a lot more composed than he looks.

“Wow. That was... something. Is that all you need?”

“No, sometimes I just work with my, uh,” Jonghyun gulps, “imagination.”

“What do you usually think about?” Minki asks.

“...People, I guess. Mostly faceless though,” Jonghyun lies through his teeth.

“Have you ever thought about anyone I know?”

 

Jonghyun would realise later that this entire conversation was all just an elaborate lead-in. He doesn’t think much of it in the moment though, since he’s too busy trying to not be too obvious himself.

“Sure,” he replies, because divulging that much should be safe.

“Who?”

“I’m not telling you.”

 

Exasperation frames Minki’s face. He decides to tackle it from another angle. 

“I’ll tell you if you tell me,” he says, and Jonghyun hates how, faced with the opportunity of learning what Minki likes, he re-evaluates his choice right away.

His hesitation doesn’t go ignored.

“Okay, how about this-- you name someone and I’ll either say yes or no to whether I’ve thought about them. Then I’ll ask you and you have to reply. Three guesses for each of us.”

Jonghyun agrees after a moment’s pause, and goes with Minhyun, because why not.

“No,” Minki says, without any hesitation at all, and wastes no breath voicing his own guess.

Jonghyun would be lying if he said he hadn’t seen it coming, but he definitely didn’t think it would be this soon. He thought Minki would dramatically leave it to be his last guess.

“Me.”

Jonghyun doesn’t know what he’s thinking when he answers yes.

Maybe it’s the boldness of Minki choosing himself as his choice, like he already has a hunch of what’s been going on.

“Huh,” Minki says, looking down at the bedsheet they’re sitting on. He quickly recovers though, before Jonghyun has the time to let himself get mortified, and changes the direction of the conversation.

Their remaining two choices each eventually remain unasked.

“In my case I don’t need porn a lot of the time,” Minki says, “Just some good music, my imagination, and my hands are good enough.” he says, and the uneasiness of the situation diffuses slightly, but a tension still remains thick in the air.

 

Jonghyun gulps.

It’s too quiet. He wants to say something, _anything_ , to clear the atmosphere, but the silence is too suffocating. All he hears is his own heartbeat hammering inside of him.

“I could ...show you,” Minki says finally, and Jonghyun stares at him for the minute that it takes for the words to sink in.

 

“I mean, it’s not like we’ve never seen each other naked. I can show you. It’s not a big deal,” Minki continues in a tone that sounds just a little too indifferent for it to be casual.

“We’re friends. No big deal,” he repeats, and Jonghyun realises that he’s waiting for some sort of response.

It’s true; they’ve seen each other naked on more than just one occasion. They’d showered together the first day they met, for crying out loud.

This could indeed be just something some friends do. Trade jacking off tips. Nothing special.

 

 _But_ , Jonghyun isn’t stupid. If things were that convenient, his life would probably be very different.

By no means does a casual _I’ll show you how I get myself off_ session necessarily have to entail actual feelings, but,

Minki also isn’t the type to say something like that just for the heck of it. Especially not after what Jonghyun had admitted to shortly prior.

This is Minki taking a shot at making a move on Jonghyun, keeping enough leeway for them to play things off nonchalantly just in case Jonghyun says no. And if he says yes, then that would essentially be an unspoken, mutual confession.

 

Jonghyun racks his brain. All things considered, he shouldn’t. At the very best, it would probably make things lean towards the “complicated” side for the two of them, and at the very worst it could affect the dynamics of the group. 

Yet, a voice nags at him from who knows where, telling him to be just a little selfish for _once_ in his life.

It feels like an eternity passes before he mutters an _okay,_ and Minki’s eyes widen. He looks like he hadn’t expected Jonghyun to actually go with it.

“As long as that’s fine with you,” Jonghyun decides to add, and Minki nods a few times.

 

He wordlessly taps on Jonghyun’s phone again, for another video to start playing. He looks at Jonghyun and then back at the screen, and reaches down uncertainly to palm himself through his boxers.

Jonghyun tries to only look at him occasionally, because he thinks that might help Minki loosen up. It becomes increasingly difficult to not stare though, especially once Minki nimbly takes his boxers off, like it really _is_ no big deal, and starts touching himself in earnest.

 It’s after the first moan that drops from his mouth that Jonghyun truly can’t help but gawk at him, at the flush that spreads to his chest, at his eyes that shut as he gets more and more into it.

“ _Jonghyun_ ,” Minki breathes, almost to himself. Jonghyun shivers as he watches the flutter of Minki’s eyelashes against his cheeks. His tone is soft, personal, but the word is spoken with purpose. Minki’s hand languidly moves down the length of his cock, and rests gently at its base.

 The porn is still playing in their peripheral vision, but Jonghyun couldn’t care less.

 Minki finally opens his eyes to look at him, and Jonghyun’s throat goes dry. He doesn’t know how to reply. Minki’s gaze piercing into his eyes is too intimate, and Jonghyun feels like he’s intruding, like he isn’t meant to see this. This is a facet of Minki he had left only for his mind to run wild with, and heck if even allowing himself that much hasn’t had him brimming with shame.

 This is someone he’s known for a substantial part of his life. Someone he shouldn’t be looking at like this. His _friend._

“J-jong..hyun,” Minki stutters, and he sounds about as wrecked as Jonghyun feels, “touch me, show me how you do it for yourself.”

 

 Jonghyun freezes.

His heart is beating so hard it’s a wonder it hasn’t popped right out of his body yet.

“...Jonghyun?” Minki asks again, but this time he’s stopped stroking himself and worry tinges his voice.

It isn’t that Jonghyun doesn’t _want_ to say anything. He does, like nothing in the world, but his mind feels simultaneously full as much as it does empty. He doesn’t know what to think, let alone say.

 

The guilt speaks first.

“Minki,” is all he starts off with, trying to come up with words as he goes, but his tone is enough for Minki’s posture to tense up.

“I,” Jonghyun says, and Minki’s stopped touching himself completely, but Jonghyun finds that his plan to not get turned on backfires a little when Minki instead leans right into him in concern.

“I shouldn’t. This is...” he tries to word himself carefully, “if you’re trying to do this out of obligation—”

“Jonghyun, you said you’ve thought about me, and if it’s even a fraction of the amount of times I’ve jacked off to you, don’t even _dare_ think that I don’t want this,” Minki says, all in one breath.

 

Silence.

 

“This will change everything.”

“No, it won’t,” Minki says as if it’s as obvious as the light of day, and Jonghyun knows deep down that he’s right.

He’s sure Minhyun, Aron and Dongho have figured it out. Jonghyun’s told a handful of his friends outside of the group at some point or the other as well, and even his sisters had pulled it out of him within weeks of him realizing it. The only person he _hasn’t_ told is Minki, because he’s been scared about the possible repercussions. But he guesses that he’s been underestimating Minki, if he thinks that Minki would go half-hearted at something he cares about.

Jonghyun knows Minki too well by now to think that he isn’t being serious, and that’s the whole issue here.

Minki lets a hand trail down the side of Jonghyun’s face.

“Don’t overthink it,” Minki says, because he _also_ knows Jonghyun too well, and his eyes turn elsewhere. Despite the fact that he’s been sitting here completely naked for the last few minutes, it’s only now that his expression borders on being embarrassed. Leave it to Minki to get shy at an odd moment.

“I think... it’s been a long time coming, right?” he sheepishly says, as his fingertips touch Jonghyun’s.

 It’s a confession as simple as that, but it does what it was meant to: it lets Jonghyun relax.

 

He lifts his face to line his eyes up with Minki’s. Minki’s face is so close, their noses are almost bumping. If he moved an inch closer, maybe even just a couple of centimeters, their lips would touch.

How ...have they not kissed yet? Jonghyun has now literally seen Minki masturbate, and they haven’t kissed yet. It’s almost offensive.

Regardless of whether they let this whole touching each other thing continue or not, very little is actually going to change. Minki _is_ right. Even if they stop here, right now, and magically manage to forget everything that has transpired this evening, Jonghyun is still going to be completely and hopelessly in love with Minki.

This is what he’s wanted, and if he can stop trying to tell himself that he’s never hoped for it, well-- Minki’s right here.

It also helps that Minki genuinely seems to want it just as much, and Minki’s happiness is an extension of Jonghyun’s own.

 

That’s the thought that passes through his mind as he presses his lips to Minki’s, slow but sure, and Minki’s lips kissing him back makes a warmth rise in him that doesn’t have anything to do with his arousal.

It feels like it lasts forever, in the very best sense of the word. It feels like a promise, and Jonghyun momentarily feels like a schoolboy, with butterflies in his stomach and his heart in his throat. He feels himself getting submerged in the high of kissing Minki, trying to memorise the soft pressure of his lips, how his hands move around Jonghyun’s shoulders and neck like he doesn’t know what to do with them before eventually resting them gingerly against the back of Jonghyun’s head.

When the kiss breaks, Minki’s upper lip still lingers against Jonghyun’s, and he feels it shift as Minki tries stringing together a sentence.

“If you don’t touch me right now, I think I might go nuts,” he says.

 

Jonghyun readily gives in.

The second his hands close experimentally around Minki’s dick, Minki’s head tilts to the side, and the way he still doesn’t stop watching Jonghyun is right out of a fantasy, just a million times more intense. It’s nerve-wracking as much as it is erotic.

Jonghyun is fleetingly glad nobody else is in the dorm at the moment, and only then does it occur to him that everyone conveniently disappearing at the same time might have been a little more than the coincidence he had thought it was.

Somehow or the other, they must have thought it was likely that the night would end up somewhat like this. More likely than Jonghyun would have considered it, anyway.

And yet, here Minki is, with a light sheen of sweat covering his face, eyes not quite shut, lips parted, practically panting in exertion, his dick in the palm of Jonghyun’s hands, and it’s _intoxicating_.

 

Jonghyun doesn’t know if he’s doing it like he’d do it personally, because being able to touch Minki kind of has his brain too fried to recall any of his regular habits. If anything, he’s worried he’s fumbling, but when he thumbs the head of Minki’s cock, slowly, like he’s imagined Minki doing for him countless times, and he hears Minki’s breathing becomes progressively more uneven, he thinks they might be on the right track.

 

In minutes, Minki’s squirming.

“I’m...n-not exactly used to... having someone else... do it for me,” he manages to somehow explain, and Jonghyun just watches, mesmerised. He’s never needed his porn, and after this, he’s definitely never going to.

When Minki comes, he lets out a simple “oh”, and spills onto Jonghyun’s hand. Jonghyun quickly gets up to fetch the two of them some tissues, which in retrospect is something they should have done earlier.

 

Their usual tissue box has been replaced with a new one that Jonghyun is sure neither he nor Minki had placed there, and his conjecture about the other members being in on this by some means or the other sounds _even_ less unlikely. 

Jonghyun sits back down, wiping his hand.

Minki has collected himself, and hastily grabs at the ball of rolled up tissue from Jonghyun’s hand and places it aside.

“My turn,” he says, with barely concealed excitement, and signals for Jonghyun to lie down. He’s past the façade of _it’s okay for friends to do this casually_ and Jonghyun wonders why they’d bothered with that whole ordeal in the first place.

 

When Minki slides only a cautious two fingers at first over Jonghyun’s cock, Jonghyun’s body tenses up at the contact.

So this is what Minki meant. Having someone else touch you was absolutely excruciating.

Jonghyun’s been turned on before, if that much wasn’t already clear, but this is completely different. It feels like his entire being is just nerves, reacting sincerely in a way he would have otherwise been unable to, craving for _more_.

“You’re stunning,” Minki sighs, and Jonghyun almost doesn’t quite catch onto it. A part of him wants to sink into Minki’s touch and let it wash over him, to just lose himself in Minki’s unabashed ogling, but a much bigger part almost wants to tell him off.

Minki is more than aware that he isn’t exactly a bad looking guy himself, but if only he _knew_ , if _only_ he could see himself through Jonghyun’s eyes.

So, "Nah, that’s you," is what Jonghyun says, breathless.

 

Then, Minki abruptly comes to a standstill.

“Jonghyun,” he says, and Jonghyun responds, curious.

 

“Yeah?” 

“Is it okay if I blow you?”

It’s a dangerously honest request, and Jonghyun gapes at him, stupefied, trying not to acknowledge all his blood rushing southwards.

“Um,” is what he chooses to say, eloquent as ever.

Minki is quick to respond. “We don’t have to. It’s just... something I’ve been wanting to, uh, try.”

 

Jonghyun senses himself nodding, even though he has no clue whether he’s agreeing to Minki saying that they don’t have to, or whether he’s agreeing to being blown at all.

How _does_ one respond when someone they’re in love with offers to suck them off?

 

It seems to be enough for Minki, who moves downwards just a notch with a _don’t worry about it_ , and continues working at Jonghyun’s shaft with his hands. Jonghyun clenches his fists at the covers of his bed. He wants to place his hand onto Minki, any part of Minki, but he’s scared he’ll grip too hard.

Their pace quickens, and Jonghyun has to actively try his best not to moan (to varying degrees of success), but then Minki slows down. Jonghyun makes a sound of concern when Minki’s hands leave him entirely.

Minki looks at him reassuringly, and repositions himself so that he’s sitting comfortably between Jonghyun’s legs. He leans forward and kisses him on the mouth before following the curve of his neck down to his chest. He looks right at Jonghyun’s face as he dips his tongue into his navel, and Jonghyun’s head tilts to the side.

Minki grazes his teeth down lower, stopping just shy of Jonghyun’s dick, and Jonghyun practically whimpers. Before he can stop himself, he thrusts upwards instinctively and since Minki is still looming over him, his dick comically nudges Minki’s chest.

Jonghyun sits up in embarrassment, but Minki’s laughing.

 

“I didn’t think you’d like that _that_ much,” he says, and his voice is hoarse. Jonghyun faces away, feeling ten times more self-conscious, but can’t help looking at Minki through the corners of his eyes. It’s just too enticing.

Minki’s tongue darts out to lick him just next to his balls, and Jonghyun can feel precome beading at his tip. He’s sure he isn’t the only one aware of it, because Minki looks right at it and licks his lips.

And it’s when he sees Minki wet his lips that Jonghyun notices.

 

It’s maddening, because even having never done anything like this with Minki, let alone anyone else, he just somehow _knows_. He can tell from the way Minki’s fingers rest on his hip lightly, almost painfully lightly; he can tell from the light but deliberate drag of lips against the skin of his inner thighs. He can especially tell from the glint in the pair of eyes focused on even the minutest shift in his expression—it’s all undeniably Minki’s own way of trying to ask for permission again.

It’s strange how certain he is about it for a change, but it’s also oddly fitting. A part of him thinks it’s because of how he’s taught himself to be able to tell when a member wants something and isn’t able to put it into words, but another part—one that’s more starry-eyed and just a little possessive—wants to believe it’s because of how long he’s loved the boy in front of him.

 

Minki’s breath ghosts over the base of Jonghyun’s cock, and Jonghyun draws in a sharp breath. He almost wants to laugh at how Minki’s way of asking if he can blow Jonghyun is by teasing him—by touching him everywhere other than where he knows Jonghyun’s body is aching for him the most.

 

...That’s right. Beneath all the guilt and the worry, Jonghyun still wants all of Minki, with every fibre of who he is. That won't change.

 

“Minki,” he breathes, and briefly registers how absolutely gone he sounds,

“Go ahead.”

 

The smile Minki gives him is breathtaking: equal parts relief, affection, and pure unfettered desire.

Minki’s eyes shut as he touches his lips to the side of Jonghyun’s cock, and slides them all the way up to lick at the tip. Jonghyun barely notices when Minki’s eyelashes flutter open again, because he’s thrown his head back to suppress a groan. It’s overwhelming; his entire body reacts to it immediately. He knows he’ll come right then and there if he lets himself watch Minki’s tongue swirling all over him.

Neither of them may be knowing jack shit about how any of this goes, but if it feels this good, they’ve got to be doing something right.

Minki pauses to take a breather, and Jonghyun risks a glance at him. His brows are furrowed in concentration, but as soon as he sees Jonghyun’s eyes on him, he immediately closes his lips around Jonghyun’s dick, goes down about halfway, and _sucks_ on the way back up.

The inside of Minki’s mouth is soft and wet and _hot_ , which is something Jonghyun had never really accounted for. His arms give, and he falls backwards onto his pillow. He hears a moan resound in the room, but it takes him a few seconds to recognise that it’s his own voice. He feels his face heat up, or at least he thinks he does, because it shouldn’t be possible for the blood to rush up to his face when he’s still so painfully hard.

The enraptured look on Minki’s face more than makes up for it, though. It’s so earnest Jonghyun could die.

 

Minki breathes out an _I need to kiss you. Right now_ , and once Jonghyun nods, he crawls up to reach Jonghyun’s face.

He wraps an arm around Jonghyun’s neck as they bring their lips together, and his other hand rests near where their erections brush (Jonghyun belatedly notices that Minki is completely hard again). This kiss is markedly different from their previous one, and Minki takes no time to swipe his tongue into Jonghyun’s mouth. It’s messier; they’re both too aroused to break the kiss to catch their breath, and Minki’s hands roam _everywhere_. Their bodies are pressed right up against each other-- Jonghyun can swear he feels Minki’s heartbeat as loud as his own. The need to keep touching him, keep tasting him, drums in his ears.

If Jonghyun knew no better than to make claims by now, he’d say his self-restraint was rather decent. But in a situation like this, with a naked, willing, _loud_ Minki rutting against him, frantically trying to touch every bit of skin that he can; Jonghyun finds himself rocking back just as much, kissing back just as hungrily, letting desire sweep over him just as thoroughly.

He moves down Minki’s neck, and runs his tongue along the curve of his collarbone, similar to what Minki had had done for him before. He feels Minki sigh shakily into his hair.

But when has Minki ever let Jonghyun have the upper hand?

“Jonghyun, I’m just putting it out there,” he says, pulling Jonghyun up to lick into the shell of his ear, “I’ve fingered myself while thinking of you.”

 

And Jonghyun feels his mind go blank.

It shouldn’t be _possible_ for him to get more turned on at this point, and yet, here he is. With the mental image of Minki on his bedsheet, face flushed with lust, back arched, two fingers up his hole, Jonghyun’s name spilling from his lips as he pushes in.

“ _Jonghyun,_ ” echoes the real Minki, right up against Jonghyun’s ear, his voice a low whisper, and Jonghyun doesn’t know how he could have ever imagined that his fantasies could even come _close_ to the real thing. The way Minki says it—smeared with pure, open, unashamed _want_ —is so lewd, so brazen, so irrefutably _him_ in nature, it actually pushes Jonghyun over the brink.

 

He lets the waves of his orgasm wash over him completely, too far gone to let any noise but a broken _“ah”_ out from within him. He comes all over Minki’s fingers.

He catches his breath, and when he opens his eyes to check on how Minki’s doing, Minki licks the come off of his fingers, almost casually.

Almost.

His face scrunches up immediately, and Jonghyun, who would have normally wished for the Earth to swallow him up at this exact situation, finds himself practically tearing up laughing.

Minki looks mock-exasperated, and he punches Jonghyun’s chest jokingly.

“I’ll get used to it,” he says, and Jonghyun smiles. He doesn’t give half a damn if Minki never tries tasting him again, not like... _that_ anyway, but he takes comfort in the promise that it inevitably entails—that this won’t be the only time they try things out.

 

Minki hasn’t stopped stroking himself. At first glance his pace seems almost relaxed, but he’s panting like he’s just run a marathon, and he’s still staring at Jonghyun, eyes half-lidded.

 “I’m the one who needs to kiss you now,” Jonghyun whispers, and Minki urgently leans into him. Both their hands work at getting Minki off, and Jonghyun fondly smiles into the kiss. The quiver in Minki’s thighs become more and more pronounced and Jonghyun can’t possibly be more endeared.

When Minki comes again, his entire body shudders, and he moans into Jonghyun’s mouth before collapsing onto his chest. Minki’s weight is heavy on him, but Jonghyun would rather die than ask him to move. He revels in the warmth of Minki’s body, in how his breathing gradually undulates into an even, relaxed rhythm.

Silence fills the room, but this time it’s back to being the comfortable quiet that the two of them are used to.

“I kind of did want you to come in my mouth though,” Minki says in conclusion, just like that, and Jonghyun is convinced that Minki’s just trying to see how far he can go till Jonghyun gets scandalised. He’d retort somehow, because Minki is absolutely ridiculous, but he’s too drained.

"Go to sleep," he says instead, but his smile shows in his voice. He lets Minki roll onto his side, their bodies still pressed against one another, hungry for even the comfort of simple physical contact, and Jonghyun takes in a deep breath, trying to commit Minki’s scent to his memory.

 

Exhaustion starts hitting them after a few minutes, and Jonghyun has to force himself to get up to clean themselves off. Minki’s a little lazier, and whines when Jonghyun disentangles himself from his arms, but also compliantly lets Jonghyun wipe him clean with a tissue.

 

“Wake me up before breakfast tomorrow,” Minki says, his tone tired, “I'll be using the bathroom first.”

“Mm,” Jonghyun nods, wondrous at how easily they're back to their usual grind.

He aims the tissues at the dustbin, and all but one make it in successfully. He can’t be bothered to rid himself completely of Minki’s warmth and go pick it up right now, and a quick glance towards the locked door reassures him that nobody will be coming in anytime soon.

If what Jonghyun suspects is actually true, nobody will want to. At least not till tomorrow morning. 

He lies back down, arranging himself so that he and Minki comfortably tangle into each other once again.

 

“Love you,” Minki whispers. It isn't something Jonghyun's never heard from Minki before, but he hadn't quite realized how badly he was longing to hear it today.

He nuzzles into Minki's cheek.

“Love you too.”

 

He listens to the pace of Minki’s every inhale and exhale slowly descend into the familiar realm of sleep. A strange serenity colours Minki’s features when he’s asleep—one that’s different from the usual energy he gives off, and it’s not far off from the hundreds of times over the years that he’s slept flush against Jonghyun in the wake of a nightmare.

This time, the difference is that Jonghyun kisses Minki’s lips, parted slightly as a consequence of sleep, before even he eventually drifts off. His eyes are shut, but he doesn’t miss how an almost-asleep Minki involuntarily smiles into the kiss, and hopes that somewhere in his dreams, Minki also feels him smile back.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> RIP THANKS FOR READING


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